I have a hangover today. A hangover from that BS, self-centered blog full of self-pity I wrote yesterday. Thanks to the folks who commented and helped me figure it out.
I am reminded that my higher power is in control, and not me. I cannot and do not need to seek out joy and happiness. I cannot find it by myself and I do not need to burden myself with the effort. I will have faith that I will be taken care of. I will do the right thing, be grateful for what I have, and joy and happiness will find me. I cannot control the outcome, it may find me in a way I do not expect and it likely will not be on my schedule. Today I am free.